Just a few days shy of one month since David began his new journey, each of us has begun the grieving process in our own way. While some have busied themselves with tasks and to do lists, I have been doing a lot of reading. It’s not surprising to me, really. I read when I’m bored, I read for entertainment and I read to learn.
I have been learning a lot lately from people who are traveling this path ahead of me. I’ve read stories where families have been crushed under the weight of grief, guilt and sorrow. I’ve also read about families who have become closer and stronger despite the tragedy in their lives. I hope that we fall into the second example.
In my daily musings, I’ve also turned to scripture; I have always found strength and comfort in the church, both the people and the Word. While others may shake their fist and curse God for taking their child, I have not. I have questions. Lots of questions that cannot be answered in books or on the internet, but I also have a feeling of comfort that one day I’ll understand why it was necessary. It’s easy to become self-centered and wonder why this had to happen to me. To us. To David. Why was his life so short while others are so long?
I draw some comfort knowing that David’s focus was on God. While his best friend is Jewish, David knew what it meant to be a Christian. He also knew that they had different beliefs and practices, but it didn’t matter to him. In fact, David considered himself half-Jewish; he couldn’t be full Jewish because he wanted to wrestle, play basketball and football and the games happened on Saturday. His friend couldn’t participate because of Shabbat. Of course, he didn’t know that he could join other leagues that didn’t have games during Shabbat.
David also enjoyed reading his bible every night. He would collect all of the crucifixes and crosses in the house and hang them in his room. He liked having them around him; they gave him comfort. David loved going to church and he always wanted to sit in the very first pew so he can see everything. We would always compromise by sitting a few rows back, but allowed him the aisle so he could see around the taller adults. He also enjoyed Sunday school and was always eager to tell us about what he learned. At home, we called him Father David, because he liked to lead us in prayer before dinner. He would laugh, but we think he liked it.
As I continue to ask questions and learn, I realize that my young son has been teaching me all along. That a childlike love for God (Matthew 19:14) and the acceptance and respect of others beliefs, is the true practice of “…loving the Lord our God with all our heart and with all our soul and with all our strength and with all our mind, and your neighbor as yourself.” (Luke 10:27 ESV)
While I await grace and understanding, I can smile at the beautiful lyrics from Danni and Lizzy’s “Dancing In The Sky”:
I hope you’re dancing in the sky,
And I hope you’re singing in the angel’s choir,
And I hope the angels know what they have,
I’ll bet it’s so nice up in heaven since you arrived,
Just like King David, who danced before the Ark of the Covenant in 2 Samuel 6:14, our David is dancing before the Lord. He’s probably also telling Him all about Eminem and Doctor Who.
I love that kid…